Done

I'm done. The packing is done. My cellphone; canceled. Went to the post office this morning with three boxes of stuff that's going to reach Sweden in 1-3 months. :X Excitement.
And so I'm left with a feeling of..... what? I don't quite know. It's like my brain knows that I'm going home tomorrow after these 18 months in Japan, but I don't understand it. It doesn't feel like I'm actually going home.... or wait, there it was. I think. I got a feeling of relief and anxiety all at once. Relieved because I really am. I really do want to go back home. But at the same time not. I really like it here and I hope I'll come back in a not too distant future. I'll probably feel at ease for about 2 or maybe 3 weeks when I get back to Sweden, but then I'm probably going to feel like "Oh wait it's time to go back now, I need to go back there! HELP!" or something. I've been thinking for like 2 months that I won't be sad for leaving but I just realized that I really am. And it kinda surprised me. So I'm sitting here paralyzed. But I need to go. Staying at a hotel in Shinjuku tonight, and I need to go by the school and get a few papers, hope they're open. :P